Mastering the Potty: A Parent’s Guide to Successful Toilet Training

Toilet training is the one thing that all parents want to get sorted out as quickly as possible – just think, no more nappies to change!  However, all children are different and will do things when they are developmentally ready. An important thing to say is not to start toilet training just because other people think you should.

How do I know when my child is ready?

Indications of readiness are that they:

•Are dry for at least 2 hours in their nappy – this indicates that they are able to hold their bladder / bowel. You will notice that you are changing less nappies in a day.

•Are physically ready – can they sit themselves on the toilet/potty and stand up when they have finished?

•Are aware of what they have done and indicating to you that they have done a wee or a poo in their nappy.

•They want to be changed straight away.

•Take themselves off when they know that they need to a poo and want privacy. Your child’s bowel movements start to become predictable.

•Can follow simple instructions such as ‘give the ball to mummy’ and let you know what it is that they want and need.

•Are generally becoming more independent when completing tasks.

What do I do next?

The first thing to consider is whether there are going to be any major changes in your child’s life coming up. If there is going to be something, it can all be a bit overwhelming, so it’s a good idea to let things settle before you start.

If things are settled in your lives and you think that your child is starting to show signs of being ready, begin to change their nappy in the bathroom so that they learn this is where toileting takes place.

After nappy changes encourage them to wash their hands so that this also becomes part of the process. 

Start to observe watch your child’s toileting pattern prior to moving over to using the toilet or potty.  Look at how many times a day they are going for a wee or a poo so that you can start to gauge what the timings might look like.

Always use positive language in relation to weeing and pooing – such as “wow that’s a great wee” or “what a nice big poo”.  Avoid using language which talks about things being stinky or yucky.

What happens next.

•If using a potty then this should be put into the bathroom and shouldn’t be used anywhere else in the house. If you are out, it depends where you are but it is likely that there will be a toilet. If not, then have a portable potty available.

•As soon as your child indicates that they are doing a wee or that they “need a wee” take them to the potty, take their nappy off and get them to sit on the potty.

•Don’t take your child to the toilet too frequently or this can make them resistant to wanting to go if you keep removing them from their play etc.

•If your child doesn’t wee or poo after 2-3 mins then take them off the toilet / potty and go back when they are showing signs that they need to go. Sitting on the toilet / potty for too long can put them off and might mean that they start to resist going.

•The next stage is to buy some ‘big girl / big boy’ pants. Again it is useful to get your child to come with you and choose their own pants.

•For boys, get a potty which comes up quite high at the front so that it helps to keep things tucked down.

•Don’t give food as a reward. Give praise but make sure that it is balanced and not too much as this can then make the child feel overwhelmed.

•Don’t deny drinks – sometimes we can be tempted to reduce how much we let children drink, but this is not helpful as you want your child to experience a full bladder and to know when they need to do a wee.

•Help your little one to wipe themselves and always front to back.